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27 Jun 2016
This has become an really challenging week as my family members and that i sit in 3rd Judicial District Courtroom in Las Cruces, New Mexico viewing and listening to the testimony and proof offered against the guy accused of killing my tiny brother. This can be the first of a number of months to come back and i question it is going to get less complicated.

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As you could possibly already know, my brother Deputy Jeremy Martin (#SFSO40) together with the Santa Fe Sheriff's Office, was shot within the back soon after an argument using a fellow deputy (allegedly) after a night around the city.
Incorporating towards the complexity of this deep discomfort is my sincere really like of my country and my enjoy of justice. I believe with all my getting in the civil liberties this great nation affords its citizens. Fantastic males and ladies have fought and sacrificed to shield and make certain these liberties. We're so privileged.
Civil liberty and justice. You really can�t have a single with out the other.
I enjoy that a man is harmless until proven guilty and wholeheartedly agree with the legal stress getting around the state to show guilt. I regard the require to get a sterile courtroom inside the see on the jury, comprised of our friends. I deeply regard an neutral judge making sure all testimony is offered firsthand along with a comprehensive document developed and managed.
Although a bit more difficult, I also respect the lawful protection as well as the guys and females who choose to think (or at the very least signify in any case) the accused party and battle for his or her rights.
I most undoubtedly don�t often agree with all the court and i desperately need to arise and communicate out in regards to the madness of what I listen to offered as some version of �truth�.
But I do not. I cannot. I'm clearly biased and that i didn't witness firsthand the occasions of that fateful night.
The 29 years I knew my brother, the textual content messages and Snapchat exchanges of that night, countless discussions and time together we shared and also the totality of my activities of and with him more than our lifetime collectively will not rely. They may be rumour at best and for that reason not admissible. And albeit, at least in the eyes of the court docket, my viewpoint on the issue ahead of it doesn't make a difference. And sadly (and with so much regret), I had been not there.
So I sit. Minding my manners and behaving, trying desperately to not be disruptive towards the court by maintaining my pain in check. My tears are properly concealed behind my box of tissue. And i permit my mother to squeeze what tiny sensation I have still left out of my hand.
I listen. As witnesses are lowered to yes and no answers often with no becoming allowed to elaborate as lawyers do their greatest to request non-leading queries in drawing out the information from the story. Numerous telling me later on they wished they may have mentioned far more.
And that i watch. As images of my brother�s bullet-riddled physique are shown. And photos on the bloody scene shown and discussed. Audio and video clip including the last times of his lifestyle along with the heroic attempts in the very first responders inside the futile try to conserve his existence.
Witness following witness describing as ideal they could whatever they saw and read. Most otherwise all obtaining never been in this kind of a traumatic and stressful circumstance. Their nerves and emotions shot. Their memory and comprehension not in a position to keep up. A reality the protection will continue to draw for the interest from the jury. With each and every little discrepancy picked aside.
Numerous lives introduced together at one time as one extremely young life was coming to an finish. It truly is apparent they as well are hurting. A lot of cry.
The result is typically a choppy narrative and confusion (at the least initially) as I and also the jury do our very best to piece together what actually occurred.
Painfully, the man accused sits there, just a number of ft absent. No discernable emotion or expression in my viewpoint. Possibly he is following instruction. Maybe he cares, or possibly he doesn�t. I doubt he'll testify. For that reason, we may possibly never know.
And whilst I desperately desire to defend my brother�s honor, I will not interact with all the defendant and I will trust the method. The Martin men are guys of integrity, courage, and community service. We fight justly.
That is certainly without doubt the glory my brother would want defended.
It really is painfully apparent to me my kid brother was not afforded the identical sterile and neutral environment when he fought for his daily life. He didn't possess a possibility when the gunfire started. Which hurts. He deserved greater.
In the end of the trial, it truly is as much as a gaggle of strangers to decide. To make a decision which story they believe. As well as in what exactly is just inside their minds.
I pray I can live with whatever they determine. I realize I'll have as well.
That is certainly soon after all, why we're here.


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